Bling, eye candy or bike porn

While riding around the 'burbs yesterday, the imminent birth of my companion's Llewellyn bike came up as a topic followed by a deep philosophical moment or 60. Would it best be described as bling, eye candy or bike porn and on a scale of compliments how do the 3 descriptors rate. Is porn higher than eye candy?? where does bling sit? can a bike be all three?

Personally I think bling is flashy (polished lugs or head stem perhaps), eye candy is good to look at (great paint job, nice geometry) and bike porn is what you drool over and would like to buy but just can't quite justify it to sig other...or indeed yourself(!). My friend says BT's are bling, (he's got one so is allowed to say that!) but that his new bike was going to be A++ bike porn. However his description of the colour and polished lugs make me wonder if "bling" ain't more accurate.
Naturally, none of MY bikes are bling! Although come to think of it, the Blueboy is VERY...well...blue.

Bluey behaved very well in his first public outing and, riding a 49/14, I cruised around the track for a planned 30 laps at close to one hour pace. Noice. 3 more Sundays doing that sort of testing, upping the laps by 10 each time and then no track for a while.

The horizontal dropouts have given up the unequal fight, shedding excess paint and so no work needed there; the wheel aligns left/right much better than the Colnago where gear changing and consequent wheel replacing was a major chore and a royal pain. Might give the Ghibli's an outing next Sunday. Hmmm.

Somebody drooled over Bluey's aero seat post so maybe he's partly bike porn. Hey, LM, is a Teschner bike porn or bling?!!